Emotional intelligence is just a fancy way of saying that we have learned to control our impulses.
We talked about using intimidation to gain respect which unfortunately is not real respect. A better tactic is to learn how to stop emotionally reacting to others so that we can remember to give them due respect which will in turn help them respect us.
3 Ways to build an emotional bridge
Here are some ways we can change emotion-based, intimidating behavior to help others reach a level of mutual respect with us.
Soften your delivery
Speaking in a lower tone and slower tempo can endear others to you and will convey to them that you are respecting their right to peace and calm.
Practice how to not take everything personally
We can perceive the world from our perspective, and we can also see things through other people’s eyes. Other people are not always out to hurt or take advantage of us. If we can stop and consider this before speaking or acting, we can greatly increase a sense of respect and mutual concern between ourselves and others.
Pay attention to how others respond to you
When you’re speaking to them or doing things in their presence, what is their typical reaction? People should be smiling, or at the very least pleasant and amenable. They should show open body language in response to what we do and say. If not, it means that we may need to work on our delivery. Do people look worried or scared when you approach? Does their body language convey a fear-based reaction? if so, you may need to learn how to extend respect to others in order to get respect from them.
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